Category Archives: China

Day 6 Makin’ It Legal

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Gotcha Day is just the beginning of what the wonderfully translated Chinese documents call the “harmonious period” which (I am not making this up) is “to encourage the mutual harmonization between the adopter and the adopted child” (I love Chinese translations). The next morning, we go back to the same offices and finalize the adoption, which means Day 6 is Adoption Day!

At 9:30 AM, we met for that good ol’ bus ride, and once we arrived at the office, we were quickly sent off to have family photos taken which will be printed on our final adoption decree (we’ll get that back once it’s notarized in 3 days). Then it was off to pay the various fees – for the paperwork, for her passport, for the notary, etc.

The actual adoption happens quite simply. The family goes in to meet with the adoption registrar (even Jordan got to go in to this one). She verifies our passports and asks us if we’re sure we want to adopt. I’m pretty sure you can guess how we answered. She even asked Jordan if he was happy to have a little sister and he said yes and shook his head emphatically which made the registrar smile. Then, we put our thumb prints on the certificate and we put Sarah’s right foot print there and the registrar says “Congratulations, you are officially parents now.” It was very emotional and a wonderful end to a long process. Sarah is now officially ours forever!

After that, we had to talk briefly with the notary and then we got to talk to the Director and Assistant Director of Sarah’s orphanage. They told us that she was “very timid” and didn’t like strangers or new things, but once she got used to them she was fine. They also said that she really loved her nannies, and that she would probably miss them, but that in time everything would be just fine and she would know that we’re her forever family.

Before noon, we were back at the hotel. At 3:00 a number of families met in the playroom which is on our floor in the hotel. It was a time for parents to share experiences, as well as for some of the children to play. Sarah just wanted to be held – she hasn’t been more than two feet from one of us since she came home. Several other families have the same issue, and it’s fairly normal since the child is worried that these new people might go away, just like every other caretaker she’s had.

In the evening, we had a “birthday dinner” with the other families to celebrate this special day. Our guides even bought a big birthday cake with a big candle that had Chinese fireworks in it. It was great fun to share a Chinese dinner and cake, and we even managed to find chicken nuggets for Jordan.

Bedtime however was another story – Sarah did not want to go to bed. It seemed like fear that if she went to sleep, maybe we would not be there when she woke up. She finally fell asleep for an hour or so, but then stayed up the rest of the night with Mommy. She’s an angel, and we keep in mind that as hard as this trip is for us, it’s even harder for Sarah. She’s lost everyone in her life that she ever loved, and only time will prove to her that we’re not going away too. It’s encouraging to see three families in our group who have adopted from China before, and watch their little girls run around having a wonderful time. We know that soon enough our Sarah will be doing the same.

Day 5 The Story

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It’s been a very full few days but here’s the gotcha day story.

At 7:30 AM, one parent from each family met in a conference room at the hotel to complete all of the local forms for adoption. Essentially adoption in China is an agreement between the orphanage director and the adopting family. Since we’re foreigners, we had to go through the additional step of getting the Chinese government’s OK first. Now, we filled out forms written in Chinese that will be used to complete the adoption. About 8:30 the other half of each family joined the meeting to sign all the papers. We spent almost two hours double and triple checking the paperwork to make sure everything was exactly right.

At about 9:30 we climbed on a bus (so far, every day in China has involved at least one bus trip) and headed for the adoption registration office. We were told on the way that the the registry official would chose which order we would get our babies … when we got to the office, we were told that we were number 8 out of 11 (8 is very lucky in China).

A few minutes after 10:00, our guides Daphne and Ellen got us lined up and ready. They started calling names and carefully checking passports, and one by one the babies found forever families.

Our first glimpse of Sarah was a smiling nanny and a crying little girl coming through a door toward us. She was bundled up in five layers of clothes, and cried like crazy for the first 20 minutes we had her (we cried a little too). She came to us with a packet of biscuits in one hand and a cigarette lighter in the other – we assume one of the nannies from the orphanage smoked and Sarah kept a firm grip on the lighter when the nanny handed her to us. The nanny seemed happy that Sarah was getting a forever family, as did the orphanage staff. By 10:15 we had Sarah in our arms and the whole event was short-lived. By 10:25 we were back on the bus headed to the hotel. Once we were on the bus, all eleven babies started crying and we parents tried to convince them that this was really a good thing, not the scary thing they saw it as.

We did manage to get the lighter out of her hand about 2 hours later.

It was actually wonderful being in a group with other parents we had come to know. Some were first time parents, while others were completing their second Chinese adoption. There are all sorts of families from all over America in our group, with one thing in common a new “spicy chili baby” in their family. It’s nice to be able to share with them as we all go through the process together.

Sarah cried for a while until we got up and walking – she likes to look around at new things, and walking seems to keep her calm. Any time one of us set her down that first day, she would cry.

We got back to the hotel and each went to our rooms for some time with the babies. Sarah needed to be changed, so as soon as we got her back, we started changing from orphanage clothes to the ones we brought. It was a gradual process and took until about 1:00 PM to get her all the way changed. We fed her and tried to keep her calm, but she was very scared – too much change all in one day.

At 2:00 Dr Su came to check the babies and we confirmed what we already suspected – Sarah had a throat infection. The doctor gave us some amoxicillin to treat her and we gave her Tylenol for the fever.

The rest of the day was spent cuddling our new family member. She liked mommy and daddy equally well, but Jordan scared her. By the evening however, she was content to watch Jordan from a distance, if not up close.

We ordered congee (rice porridge) for her dinner from room service, and as Gotcha Day drew to a close, Sarah slept peacefully through her first night with her new family.

Day 4 We’re Off To Changsha

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Most of Sunday was spent making the hour-and-a-half plane trip from Hong Kong to Changsha. The morning was getting ready, the afternoon was spent in the airport and on the plane, and then the evening was getting settled into Changsha.

While it may not seem like a long distance to travel, but when you’re traveling with 11 families and everyone has international travel paperwork to complete, and you have bus rides to and from airports, customs, immigration and everything, it can take you most of the day. Just to get everybody together and onto the bus can take an hour.

As we took a last walk around Hong Kong, we saw a Chinese wedding procession, complete with a dozen or so dancers, drums, gongs and all. The bride was in a veiled red dress, and the dancers chanted and lead the way as the wedding car left the hotel. I don’t know all of the significance and symbolism, but it certainly did draw attention to how important the day was!

After getting our travel paperwork in order, we were off to the airport to make the trip from Hong Kong to Changsha. We’ve lost a suitcase wheel coming in to Hong Kong, but otherwise our travel so far has been pretty uneventful – which is a very good thing! Our Chinese hosts have been very nice every step of the way, but it’s a big change from Hong Kong (big city) to Changsha (about 1/2 the size). It was also a big change in climate, from Hong Kong’s warm winter – our guide said that they have never had a white Christmas – to the near freezing cold and rain in Changsha. It’s a good thing we brought our winter coats!

Changsha has a history dating back over 3,000 years and is the capital of Hunan province. The province is also famous as the birthplace of Chairman Mao. Our local CCAI guides here said that Hunan babies have a reputation as being “spicy” and people from Hunan are known as brave, honest, smart, upstanding and hardworking.

Once we got to our home for the week (click here for more on the Dolton Hotel) we got an update from the orphanage on Sarah. It turns out that she’s a roommate with 4 other babies in our group of families. We are becoming close with the others in our group, but this is just one more tie to this group we’re coming to know as an extended family. She’s not potty trained (good thing we brought a lot of diapers) but she loves to play with dolls. She’s not too good with strangers, but she can call out “ba-ba” (father) and “ma-ma” (you can guess that one) so hopefully she won’t think we’re strangers for too long.

CCAI has been top notch all the way – even to providing bottled water, formula and rice cereal to help us take care of Sarah. They have volunteered to babysit or change diapers or whatever they can do to help our family. Our hotel has been great too … they got us a crib and a baby bath tub for free.

Just a few more hours until we get to meet Sarah! We keep learning more about her and her birthplace – we just can’t wait to hold her in our arms!

Day 3 Touring Hong Kong

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In order to help us get adjusted to the time change so that we can be well rested when we met Sarah, our adoption agency CCAI has us spend a full day in Hong Kong before we (as they say) “go to China”. We started the morning by wandering around a little on our own, including a trip to, yes, Starbucks! (click on any of these pictures to enlarge them)

We took a little time to set up Skype and call home (and so that we can do video conferences after we get Sarah) and to relax a little before going to meet our tour group.

Our CCAI rep Matthew took us on a tour of Hong Kong. It was pretty cool to go on a tour that was not run by a for-profit tour company – we wandered around Hong Kong getting a flavor for the area, not just stopping at all of the tourist traps.

First, we had a Dim Sum lunch. In this, they serve you small helpings of 8 or 10 different noodles and dumplings (most of which we had never even heard of before) around a large table for 10 or 12 people. The real purpose of the lunch in Chinese culture is to gather friends and family members together, so the food is served slowly over time rather than all at once. It was very good, and it was fun to meet the people we’ll be traveling and adopting with this week.

Next we went to Aberdeen city, which is home to a floating city of boat people. Each family has several boats – a house boat, a fishing boat, a small boat to go around the harbor, etc. Some families have lived and died on their boats for 150 years, only coming on to land when absolutely necessary. We took a Sain Pan boat ride around the harbor and through the boat people city. Jordan loved being on a boat, and Lynn and I just sat back and enjoyed the scenery.

Next we went to a jewelry factory, where they showed us how jade and other jewelry are hand-crafted. They also had a very expensive showroom (we passed).

Then we went on to Stanley Market, which is an old housing area where they have set up street stalls and small shops. Over time, it’s become a huge market that winds up and down streets and alleys and is very cramped. We found a few small souvenirs, and had a fun time looking through the crafts and merchandise.

Next, we went to Victoria Peak, at 1300 ft, the highest point on Hong Kong island. We climbed a tower to look out over the city as it was getting dark. It was hazy so we couldn’t see very much, but is was fun all the same.

Finally, it was a ride back through downtown Hong Kong and back to the hotel. Nobody on the bus opted for a night trip into town – we all basically came back to our rooms and crashed out on the bed. Jordan was in bed by 7:00, which of course meant he got up at 4:00 this morning. Hopefully we’re a little better adjusted to the time change, but I think naps will still be crucial this week. We’ll probably get fully adjusted to being here in time to fly back home (grin). Oh,well – it’s well worth it!